I know…I know, late again…oh well I hope you all enjoy it.
Welcome to “Inside the Character Studio” please give a warm welcome to our host;
Mr. Jim Brisk Oliver Clozeoff!
Wait! What? Who the hell are you? What are you doing on my show?
Oh, you’re still here….awkward…
What do you mean awkward? What the hell is going on here?
Well yah see, it’s like this fella. After yer little melt down the other day, tha big wigs have decided you need tah have a little time off.
Time off? What are you talking about?
Well yah see…What I am tryin tah tell yah is that…No one called you?
What? No, why would anyone call me?
What is so funny?
Don’t you get what he is saying?
I can barely understand him with that damn accent. What am I missing? What don’t I get?
Let me put this in terms you might understand. He is saying, the company is going in a new direction.
Your position is redundant, and your services are no longer needed.
*blinks* You’re fired, shit canned, laid off, cut back, down sized, and let go.
I…I don’t work here? But why? What did I do wrong?
You were born!
That’s enough Zander, the poor bloke feel bad enough as it is.
Now look fella, t’was nothing personal.
Not personal? I got fired, how is that not personal?
Tha big wigs at corporate felt that ah little change might help tah get Zander tah answer questions better.
Yeah right, like you can do any better. He is impossible. He is childish and stubborn. Besides, I have gotten him to answer hard questions what softball questions have you gotten from him?
His first sexual experience…
That’s what I thought you got noth…wait you got what? What did you do drug him?
No, I just talked with him.
Son of a …
Look tah show there are no hard feelins hows about I let you be my side kick?
I was gonna have open auditions for the part after the show for any beautiful, smart n funny lass but I guess havin yah as a sidekick might be fun too.
Y-you would do that…for me?
Thank you, you won’t regret it.
Yes you will.
Okay, than shall we start the show?
Ladies and gentlemen please, would yah bring yer attention to me. Welcome to tha show, please come inside! Today we will recommence our in depth look into tha life and mind of Zander Bearach, on, “Inside the Characters Studio”.
That was your intro?
Aye t’was, why?
Nothing…it’s your show now, do whatever you like.
I intend to.
Okay…I just thought.
What? What did yah think?
I just thought maybe it could have been more…I don’t know…informative.
I see…I will have tah work on that thank yah for the info Brisky keep up tha good work.
You see what I had to put up with?
Aye lad, I get it now.
What was that?
Nothin Brisky, nothin at all.
My name is Jim Brisk, not Brisky, please call me Jim or Mr. Brisk.
O…kay…I will try tah remember that.
So, let’s get to it shall we Zander?
I don’t have a choice do I?
No lad, yah don’t.
Than lets get to it.
That’s tha spirit mate.
…Just like that?
You are going to answer his questions without any pulling of teeth?
I didn’t say all that, but yeah pretty much.
What the hell man?
I kind of like him. You…not so much.
Are ye two done?
That’s up to him.
Okay fellas let’s continue on.
Yes let’s, so Zander…
Hold on Brisk, this is my show now, I do that askin.
Anyway, Zander lad. Ah lot happened yesterday leading tah tha changes we are faced wit today. That was yesterday and this is today, so let’s move on and maybe if there is time we can get back tah tha answers yah gave ol Brisk there. Are yah okay wit that?
I don’t know. Maybe.
See he won’t answer your questions either!
You know what. Eat a bag of dicks Brisky.
Okay, okay fellas, that’s enough of that. We are gonna focus on today and should we have tha time we can look back.
Brisk no one asked yah mate so keep it at yer self would yah?
Fine, but you’ll see he won’t answer your questions either.
Would you just shut up?
Okay, let’s put the hostility away and move on. Zander, today we want tah find out how yah cope wit tha stress when tha world seems tah want to crap on yer shoes.
He won’t answer.
Table it Brisky.
It’s Mr. Brisk, not Brisky.
It is whatever I damn well want it tah be. Understood?
Anyway. Zander how do yah handle it when tha world takes a nice steamy shit on yah?
To be honest…
Here we go.
Shut it Brisky.
As I was saying before I was so RUDELY interrupted. The way I deal with things when they are going badly has changed over the years.
Figures you would try and stall.
Didn’t I tell yah tah shut it?
Yeah didn’t he tell you to shut it?
Yeah but he is…
No buts, unless yah have something instructive tah add I don’t wanna hear it.
So yer coping methods have changed, that is not unusual. How have they changed?
Well, when I was younger I coped with things violently. I had a lot of anger when I was little, so I would often take it out on walls and doors.
You’re not buying this are you?
Don’t make me come over there side kick.
So, yah beat up walls and doors when yah were little, how has it changed?
Well, in my teen years I wasn’t so violent. My uncle managed to curb my violence with…chores.
For the love of…he is LYING!
Ignore him. So what kind of chores are we talking about here?
You know, the normal stuff I guess, you know, sweeping the shop, inventory…things like that.
Zander, lad…I have ah feeling yer holding something back but I will let it be fer now.
So, do yah still do chores now or has it evolved again?
It has, I was put into the arena when I was nineteen so from that point to recently it kind of took care of itself.
I see, and now?
Now, I find the bottom of the bottle can make you forget having a shitty day quite easily.
So, yah drink a lot?
Not as much as you would think.
So how do yah cope with tha stress that Skyrim gives yah since it is constantly trying to kill yah?
Ha! See he won’t answer watch. Just watch!
That’s enough, I don’t wanna hear another peep outta yer mouth.
Okay…Well, I drink on occasion but not often. I guess I the way cope with Skyrim trying to kill me is by finding a nice bed and a good recap of the day keeps me grounded and clear of mind.
Makes perfect sense lad. Thank yah for sharing that tid bit.
…That’s it? REALLY!? What the hell!
That’s all tha time we have fer today. I hope yah will join us again tomorrow when we continue our 28 Days of Character Development where we will have another rousing good time with Zander, right here on “Inside the Characters Studio”. I am yer host Oliver Clozeoff saying, “Be good if yah can’t be good be naughty, but be good at it.” Good night everybody!
Wow, what a show! I hope you all enjoyed it. Again at the risk of sounding like a broken record I still need questions folks so please don’t hesitate to ask. If you are shy you can use the form below to send me questions or if you are not shy you can just ask them in the comments section of the blog along with any comments you might have. Thanks again all. See you for the next installment.